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Anger Management

January 13, 2009

A very short play about a Christmas gift gone wrong.

Scene: Produce aisle. Three-year-old Tom is riding on the end of Mom’s grocery cart. He is in an excellent mood.

Tom: (Points to a head of romaine lettuce.)
Mama, is this kale?

Mama: Nope, that’s lettuce. This stuff over here is kale. But it’s kind of old and floppy. We’ll get some next week.

Adorable 18-month-old girl enters stage left. She is wearing a pale-pink, zippered snowsuit. Curly brown hair  peeks out beneath of hood ringed with white fur.

Girl: (Waving and smiling)
La la la, ba ba!

Tom: (Gives her the stink eye, and remains silent)

Girl: (Grinning)
Zha zha ba ba, Hi!
(She laughs.)

Tom: (Growling)
You are making me angry. You won’t like me when I’m angry!

Mama: (Rolls eyes and pushes cart quickly to another section. Suppresses a grin and mutters under her breath.)

Thanks, Uncle John.



Please Pray

January 7, 2009

Gretchen, over at Lifenut, delivered baby Archie yesterday. He is now in NICU, and the doctors don’t yet know what’s wrong with him. Please keep Gretchen, Archie and their family in your prayers.


January 5, 2009

She was asleep on the bus, her chubby toddler legs spread wide, revealing a pair of white cotton panties beneath her miniskirt. Her silvery shoes rested on her mother’s lap as she burrowed her head into her father’s shirt.

My glance trailed across the rest of her little family, sitting across the bus aisle from me as we rode back from Disney World. Despite the Florida heat, the father was wearing a long-sleeved plaid shirt and long pants. Mom was covered head-to-toe in a black burka, with only her dark eyes peeking out. She spoke quietly to her husband in Arabic. An expensive-looking pair of dark-indigo blue jeans peeked out beneath the hem of her robe.

I thought about how hot she must have been all day, walking around the theme park in the sun in all those layers without even a hint of breeze to cool her.

She cradled her infant son in her arms and fiddled with a fold at the top of her burka. Without the reference of nose or chin, it looked like she was touching her shoulder, until her son began rooting, and I realized she was breastfeeding him.

I looked from daughter to mother. The daughter: about age four, in modern, adorable clothing, with her skirt hiked up around her waist. The mother: covered, silent, invisible.

Keep reading at Crunchable.

Elf Dance

December 8, 2008

Thanks to Gretchen at Lifenut, I’ve been wasting time this afternoon. But the results are oh-so-cute!

Vodpod videos no longer available.

more about "Elf Dance", posted with vodpod

He Walks on Water (Sort of)

December 3, 2008

We’ve been practically walking on water here in the Wishful Thinking household. About a week ago, our 100-year-old plumbing began its death march. Our always slow-draining tub, the only one in the house, stopped draining at all. Bathing became a nasty dance in icky water while trying to clean the rest of your body as quickly as possible.

A bad situation, but one that Handsome Husband was sure he could fix. And I was glad for his handiness, since my sister and almost her entire family are arriving tomorrow for an early, weekend-long Christmas celebration.

Eight people (three of whom are stinky teenage boys) plus one non-functional shower did not equal holiday harmony in my mind.
Read more…

Conspiracy Theory

November 26, 2008

It’s no big secret to my readers that Christmas is not my favorite holiday. The spend, spend, spend culture leaves me angsty, with an empty wallet and a house overflowing with stuff I don’t need, or in many cases, want.

So when I learned about this, I did a happy little dance in my chair. You can bet I’ll be participating. Will you?

Because Seth is Cute, Too

November 7, 2008